Often I sit to ponder over myself.
I interrogate my own self - "What is my identity? Where do I come from? Who do I actually belong to? What is my existence on this planet?" etc. etc.
However, I have been left unanswered.
There comes no solution to all the pensive dilemmas.
Ever since my teenage, there has been something which mentally grew me up. Since then itself, I felt like I need to search for my lost soul !
There is a greed in me I sense.
A greed for compassion, to burst out, to speak up, to be counted as someone in the crowd and not remain unnoticed.
It is my soul perhaps who wants to clamor even amongst the humans.
What am I? Am I a human without a soul, or a soul without the body? What do I want to seek? The public affection or my bottom self?
Whom do I think I feel comfortable with? A man or a woman?
I dont know ! I am obscure to the choices. Choices which were made by the evolution, landed us as humans on the planet.
It is uncanny.
It is absurd to find the real you.
It is a grave mound you ought to dig, to get answers, to be answered precise.
Frequent, my inner spirit touches me deep down, to make me feel that there are two different creatures in one.
It makes me feel that I differ. I differ from all those who seem so certain.
I think I differ in thoughts, or the mind-set...or the perspective.
But I differ.
I claim. Atleast I feel I do.
I interrogate my own self - "What is my identity? Where do I come from? Who do I actually belong to? What is my existence on this planet?" etc. etc.
However, I have been left unanswered.
There comes no solution to all the pensive dilemmas.
Ever since my teenage, there has been something which mentally grew me up. Since then itself, I felt like I need to search for my lost soul !
There is a greed in me I sense.
A greed for compassion, to burst out, to speak up, to be counted as someone in the crowd and not remain unnoticed.
It is my soul perhaps who wants to clamor even amongst the humans.
What am I? Am I a human without a soul, or a soul without the body? What do I want to seek? The public affection or my bottom self?
Whom do I think I feel comfortable with? A man or a woman?
I dont know ! I am obscure to the choices. Choices which were made by the evolution, landed us as humans on the planet.
It is uncanny.
It is absurd to find the real you.
It is a grave mound you ought to dig, to get answers, to be answered precise.
Frequent, my inner spirit touches me deep down, to make me feel that there are two different creatures in one.
It makes me feel that I differ. I differ from all those who seem so certain.
I think I differ in thoughts, or the mind-set...or the perspective.
But I differ.
I claim. Atleast I feel I do.
© Latika Sareen
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