And "IT" happened to her... The unforgettable phase of her Childhood !

       She was 11.. Perhaps a year or two younger than that. The life for her had just commenced..
The unwoven dreams, the real power, the reality of the world.. was just a blur image to her.. Yet she moved on.. she moved on at that tender age, to be a mature, fulfilling woman.. woman?? At 10? You might be thinking how young she is to even build something like "maturity" in her head.. However it was snatched from her with time.. over time !
Her family consisted of just 4 family members.. The storm was gonna arrive but she was naive to understand anything like that.. She didn't even have the worldly knowledge ! The attitude towards people was just as juvenile as that of a baby.. Her father, her grandmother, her younger brother and her dad's younger brother.. was her clan..She was never solitary without any adult's consideration.. She always had someone or the other to look after her, to take care of her, because she was lonely..
Mostly, her dad's brother (who was about 22 years older to her) always surrounded her.. Wasn't it supposed to be like a family gesture? It was yet it wasn't.. There were some freaky intentions of her dad's younger brother, but as i said, she was in her adolescent phase of life. Every time there was no one else to take care of her or look after her, he was the one who always popped out from somewhere or the other with those devil sights..

She had a plight to cry in.. Her dad used to be at work, her grandmother was too old to keep running behind her.. her brother was only 7, a kid himself.. the only being left who wanted forcefully to see her was her dad's brother.. Deliberately things were being done by him to get the girl closer to him. For god sake 22 years was a big difference. He used to pamper her, used to bribe her by getting chocolates and money, food.. blah
So being alone just with her was his only motive.. his only aim.. his only devilish purpose..
The time of the day he used to see her by herself playing or drawing, he used to catch up to her and give her that negative eye sight with no good intentions in them. However, she never was scared because he was her dad's brother who she thought of as a family..

He got her this time, alone.. He tried "touching" her, everywhere on her body she was never comfortable with.. No one was home except the old grandmother who was in another room.. He was in another room with the girl, he misbehaved, on and on but slowly by making the girl greedy for the stuff he used to get.. money.. chocolates.. toys... it wasn't even understood to her that what is he even planning to do, she had no idea what molesting was.. It was cold season while she was sleeping in her room with her grandmother in another.. He came inside ! Got in the quilt with her and touched her body ! Kissed her neck, her face, her lips. She woke up, had a sense that something is going on terrible yet she remained silent. He got on her, opened her pants, and did what he wasn't supposed to. He tried making love to her but she kept going away to a distance. She had fear in her eyes ! She was SCARED ! He was a drunkard, a terrible chain smoker.. a man of no importance.. a man who didn't have any aim in his life except molesting girls.. he was a rapist to the girl !!

He kept getting closer to her, kept kissing her with her lips with no movement.. kept licking her face and ears..
He asked her to put her hands in there.. He had those guts to ask his niece.. She refused, she tried going away from him with those fearful eyes.. He held her hand and got her back on the bed.. It was done with her deliberately.. she was bearing all; he had threatened her not to utter a word against him, or else he would not leave her.. She was silent, everyday of her life in that phase was a challenge for her to get over with. She was a prisoner in her own house. She had those sleepless nights of fear.. those moments when she used to sweat like anything in the middle of the night thinking what if he touches her again !

of course she tried telling all to her grandmother, by saying "Mummy, chachu was touching me yesterday". However, the grandma tried to ignore it by thinking shes just playing or shouldn't talk like this about her dad's brother.. she then never had courage to tell anyone because she thought no one would believe her..
He molested her.. He did by being closer to her as a family member.. Years later.. when she turned 13, nothing had changed.. The negative, intentions were still there, but now she was a grown up.. She knew the character of her dad's brother.. She stayed all distant from him, yet he appeared in front of her like a ghost figure and made her go through the ugly phase again.. she even had several fights with him screeching to stay away from her.. Would he have listened? He was a beast; a demon.. a slut !

Finally she got rid of him, she got thousands of miles away from him.. Shes a mature young lady now.. Shes sensible of judging the good and bad.. Yet whenever she sits down in an uncomfortable ambiance or see a man coming closer to her.. Her heart fails to beat.. She gets numb and tries getting away from such moments.. Perhaps that's the major reason she doesn't like MEN ! She claims "Men are dogs" every time the image alarms her.. And the man.. HE IS STILL ALIVE SUFFERING THROUGH TONS OF DISEASES AND ISSUES.. She wants him dead anyhow... But those astounding times of her teenage still gets her low and she cries.. she gets in tears..

She has faced the unexpected... She is still not out of it, perhaps she never would be... It gets harder for her to trust Men... because she knows it all now, she knows what "touching" is.. But still, it was Intimidating even then.. and its Awfully Breathtaking even now.. -_-

© Latika Sareen

Really? "Happy" is the word?

Shes trying to escape from the memories of one...

Shes crying yet laughing out there...

She knows whats right yet she likes the wrong..

Shes pretending all to be FINE with..

She doesn't answer any questions, nor she asks any...

She pretends like everything is all-right..

Shes thinking and capturing the Wow moments in her head...

With swollen eyes ; dead inside..

She will pretend like nothing had happened...

She will still smile and happily move on...

                  She was getting used to the "scenarios of life"...

Now, Shes accustomed to all..

© Latika Sareen

Friends for life.. Life for Friends.. Lovable Creatures !!

My Mentioned madonnas.. XoX

          I have a feeling right now to break apart.. just to get done with things and say goodbye to the world..

Sounds too chicky? Actually, dilemmas are such that it tends to reach the "got done" part.. Anyhow, since losing and winning is the part of the game, so i wont back off.. nevertheless i prefer losing..

I never knew that one day out with the best of the friends could make you escape the disputes and scrapes. Yesterday was perhaps one of another Coolest days of 2012 ! A small get together could even make the miseries diminish as if they never were scratched upon... After all friends are what they prove to be there for..

1. 1. The Honesty
2. 2. The Devils
3. 3. The real selves..

As listed.. Without being truthful lies no center ... I love how 2 of my really close ones would never dare to hurt me in any way or lie to me.. Its like a chain with a good deed ends up getting good.. Am i not lucky enough to have them in my life? Mucho Mucho luckyyyyy !!

The devils? are u thinking why i listed that above? Because, if a devil being chatters and gains the sympathy, even if its easier for me to be gullible.. The two Madonnas  in my life would kick his ass just to make him feel their power.. Ha Ha

The last but not the leastt -- The REAL SELVES ! The two young ones, don't conceal themselves anyhow. They are truly the two real inside out beauties in my life.. Their aura remains with the ones they interact.. The charm is never ending.. and the best part of them is that they bring you alive from the dead scenarios..

Demands of a normal human being would never come to and end. A fact is a Fact ! However The only understatement to be used would be that, friends would always be there even if "love" of yours ain't..

Oh yes, ask the ones who have been on the road before... The new path takers, got no experience.. Blah!

Life indeed is short.. Then why do we spend half of our lives fussing and arguing about the care and love we bestowed? Its hard to make everyone comprehend the needs and necessities of one soul.. Yet, The best friends get all.. :) Cheers to the power of such bonding !! 

© Latika Sareen

The Cognition to Success

   Everyone dreams... everyone has a perception and a way to attain their desired goals.. But how long is the journey to "success" to be familiar with the celebration of it? Yeah, it is something to be somewhere of your choice.. Its a mixture of your sentiments which cant be expressed when the desired thing is fulfilled..
Success - has a different meaning to everyone or as to say the vision to success is diverse . Some of us just think of it as of buying a house... some of us take it as being in a relationship... some of others take it as shopping while some really mean to toil for the zenith of satisfaction. . . Its like pushing yourself against gravity and observing the results..
The feeling to success is not ordinary... It could be felt and not be said.. It could be achieved by working harder and be rejected with an idle mind.. Its all in one go.. Its all in one go...

For the awaited satisfaction of success, it turns up all fancy to celebrate with. I mean if it was that easy to get something, then today i would have been on the moon planting houses.. which ultimately becomes inflexible  than even imagined. Until and unless we are willing not to give up on our lives and the "fun".. it would be soothing and elating to acquire the unfulfilled wishes.. Afterall, everyone gets to face the battle of success and failure know !

Just the ordinary thinking to what people take accomplishment as needs to be modified.. Its not just about getting wet in rain or watching porn with your boyfriend.. Its dense in context as to what needs to be done about the scratched lives.. Awakening is one of the most effective ways or the initiative to what needs to be clarified about your own selves.. Backing off diminishes the dream of being somewhere.. A degree costs nothing as to what the knowledge is.. Papers would remain papers, but the education you give to yourself will be remarkable i guess.. Yah i think it would be.. The society needs to affront complex plights of failure and achievements.. Nothing goes down if a piece of stone is thrown into the sea.. A required change is lacking amongst the members of the family (society) as to what is the feeling of "success"..

The youth would be the adjustment and power to get those dreams and chimera carried out..
I believe all we need is initiative.. rest is upon us to continue or fall back enduring the guilt..
Be cognitive to the sections of your life, rather than just assuming and imagining the pictures of useless, broken illusions..

Face it..face it.. feel it.. feel the fame..a man of value indeed... - Albert Einstein

© Latika Sareen

Dil - e - Dastaan

Dil masroof na hai tumhare bina,
Pyaar kiya jo hai tumse..
Jitna chahein nigaahein faer lo,
Tumhari dillagi hai sirf humse..

Chahe jahan me tumhe pa na sakein,
Rahenge tumhare dil me hum...
Mil jaana humein to honsla badega,
Warna tod denge hum dum...

Bahut shiddat se ikraar kar paye dil o jaan,
Chod na dena humein darmiyaan...
Rahengi daastan muqambal jo ho jaaye,
Arwah meri tujhme fanah ho jaaye...

Un sehroo me jaake tumhari abroo karein,
Dil ne jise sehlaya hai...
Pyaar ko pyaar se kya kehna,
Waqt tumhare dar pe humein laaya hai...

Deedar hum karne lagein tumhara,
Fakr se tumhe apnaya hai...
Naa jaane dil ki bechaeni koi,
Mod aisa zindagi me aaya hai...

Takalluf na kar, keh de jo kehne aaya hai,
Mohabbat ke alfaaz ko bayan kar...
Parwaah na ho kisi ki humein,
Aisa mere pyaar par aitbaar kar...

Rehna na ab khafa tu humse,
Pyaar kiya jo humne tumse,
Jitna chahein nigahein faer lo,
Tumhari dillagi hai sirf humse...

© Latika Sareen

Feeling Extraordinary**

       There always have been 'n' number of times when i have felt the same i.e nothing extraordinary really has happened to me. However there comes a turn on the road when waves in the ocean promote. I stood still when my heart skipped a beat and I.. I gasped.. It was intense. Felt as if its just me who exists in this beautiful creation. It was sound and atoning, for a while i couldn't put a limit on my giggle. It began with a flow and never took a pause.
It was a couple of years ago.. We had never interacted before, it was the first time, it indeed was the first time.. But how could the first time be such an enchanting image that you yearn for several others like that?
'Yahoo' was a medium to converse.. There was apprehension from both sides, the restlessness of contacting for the first time. Things weren't stable, nonetheless he called.. I heard him, it was like a grip instructing me to catch his voice and.. and breathe..I smiled without letting him notice..
For about hours, we conversed on the phone. Naah naah it was nothing personal, we conferred our experiences, our strength, likes, dislikes, family etc. That night seemed to be an illusion. A live dream!!..I felt a stroke commanding me to accept his voice as a tone of some extraordinary belief..  I loved it..!!


O Yah.. there were nights and mornings succeeding the old ones.. The times when we used to crash on the phone itself while communicating,the best conversations were at 3 AM, the most sincere words were from the heart, and the best moments were those spontanious urges to seize the moment. .. the wait and elation to listen to each other & engrossed in thoughts somewhere.. We used to get hold of unoccupied times hurriedly.. Gradually, the peculiar of us entered the circle of stronger bond which we anticipated to be fortune. The memories which are certainly noteworthy. After all, this feeling was unusual..
  Days and Months passed.. there was this sensation of feeling inclined to this one person, who was bizzare a couple of months ago. The penchant of him, replaced a friends' status. It was now seeming to b a little more.. Just a little more.. It is said that "Your sentiments should be as smooth as water on the mountains, so that the one you admire, gets an account of your feelings". Something like that had occurred when he had a job & chatted while working. Be it day or night, i used to wait for those minutes when i will receive a 'hello'.. At times, our calls used to take more than 5 hours in a row.. Again, it was nothing personal, however a take-up about our 'Crushes' wasn't a bad commence. I infer that we were young enough to consider affairs contemptibly.


    Though, it seemed that we really had felt special about each other in a short span of time.. For the level of comfort.. easiness was not found in anybody else in these years except him.. And absurd me, who uttered everything at once. HE GOT TO KNOW IT!! I admitted that i like him intensely..Aah, one question.. Why, why am i so bashful?
I could never pick an answer for this.. Besides he used to be in a fit of rage because of my shyness. He likes it too.. ha ha.. Seems to be contradictory know? Besides all the talks, and appealing personality.. We used to throughly have a dispute.. It was like a part of our schedule, trivial matters and one of us had to start..
Was like we were paranoid and after 2 days, i had to pacify him.. Sadly, hes really stubborn, Whereas I am the punk, he he.. I didn't really care about the quarrels of daily times, I could be the one loving you and disliking to the utmost in general.. Just me..!!
O boy, those days were something else.. It was naive, but an insanity within something.. It was Beautiful..
& it still is a mesmerizing pleasure..Months passed.. Perhaps a year too.. i no longer could hold back the actual desire to see him.. to gossip and say all unsaid .. maybe it wasn't that basic to do what i estimated.. The unusual thing grew.. The inkling about liking each other 'alot' remained constant. The things were told.. Moments that were equally cherished..


O well.. a story had commenced, a saga, which wasn't there to terminate, but to be loyal and prolong with it.. Yah the Partial Crush.. It's not uncanny to be with just the one you value.. It's just a symbol of being together.. together.. Yah optimistically, that has to happen. I like/liked his soul, fell in love with it and now the attachment ultimately means his presence.. That close link with him was one of a kind.. is one of a kind.. & will be one of a kind in some circumstances..
He has always wished good for me.. "Wants me content in any & every way, that's his motive".. He couldn't made anything better than what actually had happened, it was & is something momentous..
which has had an alluring impression..on me & him..


"True love stories never have endings... They just dont.. & so this love story will never come to a halt..It cant be defined, it can only be felt.. by just me and him"...
Your Lats!!

© Latika Sareen

Its a Journey to be continued..

Life goes on n on n on.. 

I remember i was 10, clamoring and weeping while screeching  : "Mummy, you cant go, you cant leave your kids and reside in a place where you wont be satisfied".. those days were something when she was feeble; helpless because she was trynna snatch a good life for her kids in this material world. We were too small to understand such talks, yahh.. It was meant to be an "Understanding Plight" where i lacked brain.. I was 10.
Growing up was a big task handed over to me. It was a bundle of authorities to be concerned about.. Again, i was just 10 years old..


11..12..13.. Moved on.. Until 16 i remained an infant.. However should i term it as a wish or a fulfilled desire that the matter I have wished for until now in my life, hasnt gone in vain.. Those efforts to get things done, even as a child were priceless.. Some excitements take your breath away; perplex you; astound you; while some just pass by your mind and whisper that "you deserve all of it".. Isnt that beautiful? I mean, such a unique clutch you get a hold onto and it stays.. it does stay.. for long..


Dad used to stay with me in our house, Delhi.. While he used to sing me lullabys and narrate stories, mummy was busy pondering over her kids' snapshots. It was another moment that seized my heart..
The love, the affection, the care.. nothing is bullshit unless you really close your eyes and mean each and every word.. I have always supposed my parents to be the greatest like every othr child. Am i not blessed to have them; ones  who admire you every moment.. ones who take care of your unexpressed feelings.. ones who support you when you limp.. delightful!!


Its being carried on.. It is, truly.. the same sensation of cherishing them.. all.. myself.. and you!


Its a mixed packet of spices.. nevertheless am just gazing at the brightest color.. I amm...


© Latika Sareen